{heavy}

Heavy is the feeling when I look at the world
the pain, suffering, misdirection,
heavy burdens
Murders, war crimes, hate crimes
Can’t I wish for them to have a life?
Heavy because of the church
doesn’t Jesus want us to love
to rise up against
discrimination
marginalization
misdirection?
Heavy to know
love is far away
family, across the country
friends, scattered in the wind
love, across the mountains
Heavy to see
defensiveness
because “how could I have been fooled”
it’s ok to be wrong
to admit you didn’t know better
Heavy to feel unwell
like my body is keeping me captive
monthly pain
daily aches
patchy patterns
Heavy with loss
are they really gone forever?
it aches, always
it is always in my dreams
and I wake
Heavy
I wish I could make sense

Sense of it all
What is the purpose?

To love?
To protect the earth?
The children?
The unloved, forgotten, cast out

What is true?
it is heavy to fight
against twisted words
warped history
unkind meanings

is it possible?

is it worth it?

I think so.
I hope so.

I know it.